Grow baby grow!

Went for my ultrasound today and the tech was very tight lipped..my IM kept asking her, is that a baby? What is that? And she kept ignoring her...lol! Then she called in for a second opinion...geez heart was pumping at this point...the manger comes in and wrecks complete havoic on my poor va-ja-ja.

And she beams..."CONGRATS!...!!, you have ONE perfect, beautiful baby!" No heartbeat, but you are 5wks-5d so we won't see one for at least another 3-4days. WOOO HOO! Things are looking good..

Then we go to see Dr.L and he has a diff. story...yes...there is a baby now, but no heartbeat...so be prepared for a DNC next sunday if there isn't one....geeeez Dr.L, way to rain on our parade... :)

OH well...we all decide to be happy and positive and little bebe Z is getting its heartbeat...just give em a few days! So I am off to Create...AGAIN...(3rd time this month next sunday!) YEY!!! I am happy...and very excited grow...baby grow!!!!

I'll take a BIG glass of Positive!

What a roller coaster the past two days have been!

So Beta 3 was 1043 and Beta 4 was 1117....NOT good...we should be doubling.

So I got the call from Create to STOP all meds, that the pregnancy was not viable any longer. Oh I was crushed...so was not expecting this! And that I needed to come into Create ASAP for an ultrasound to make sure it wasn't an ectopic pregnancy. More stress....

I got to Create today, the whole time reciting to myself, everything is going to be ok...everything is going to be ok...

IM (intended Mom) and I squeeze into the ultrasound room and then tada....4 freaking embies are still in me...they are small BUT we still have a fighting chance!

Dr.L was surprised they were still all there and said get back on those meds...your beta is now at 1337...not doubling BUT lets give this the benifit of the doubt and see you back here next sat.

Ok...we all feel like we can breath again...now we are praying and hoping for a miracle...come on little babies grow!

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers and send LOTS of sticky vibes this way! I am positively crusading for these babies!

Soul Sister

I wanted to share this beautiful poem that my soul sister Cynthia sent me. I got this while sitting and waiting to get my 3rd Beta test and bawled my eyes out...oh hormones how I love you!

Beta test so far:
TEST 1: 500
TEST 2: 963
We're growing here!

There hopes and dreams lie within you
kicking and turning
keeping you and james up at night (not yett butt)
and tired all day...
...For "them" you are a making a fantasy come alive
so giving and selfless, warm and caring
my admiration for you knows no end
The fruit you will bear is there future
there present is filled with anticipation and wonder...
As you grow (more beautiful each day)
know that my thoughts are with you friend
My heart beats with yours
my eyes will cry yours tears
while you make there world brighter and happier.
I am here for you on this trip
path of pure bliss
from an amazing miss
LOVE YOU AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL SOUL